Still Under Construction

   

  I recently had a "grr" moment from someone in my past.  As I was coming home, I did some EFT (Emotional Freedom Tapping) on the situation, and decided I no longer needed to have this person's energy in my life and so I was done with them.  As I get older, I realize I always have an option to be in situations that suit me or not.  I also know from experience that every "grr" moment I have is actually one with myself, and until I clear whatever is causing that "grr" moment, I will continue to have them.  As I think about this "grr" moment, because the mind always wants to keep going over and over the moment until it deems itself righteous, I have to laugh because also recently on one of the Facebook groups I follow, the question was posed, "What is the greatest gift you can give someone?"  Me, in my infinite wisdom, (ha ha), replied, "Allow the person to be who they are."  Funny how the Universe tests your theories and wisdom.  I understand this phrase, I try my best to believe it and follow it, but it does not mean that I have to continue to allow this person to be in my life.  Of course, I also know that until I clear whatever button they are pushing, I will continue to have these "grr" moments with them or others.  I know which button it is, that I think everyone should like me.  This was brought to my attention while watching a rerun of an old show, "One Day At A Time."  So, I thank the Universe for bringing me this "grr" moment, for bringing to my attention that I still have Self doubt about myself, that loving myself means loving all parts of myself, (even the "grr" moments) and it is time to clear and heal it.  My Ego would love nothing more than to say to this person, "Hey, you hurt my feelings, why are you so mean to me and others?  What is YOUR problem?"  My Soul calls me gently and says, "There is no problem.  The situation is an illusion that you have made up, there is only Love."  As I write this, a song pops into my head, "A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri, and I can hear my Soul singing to my Ego, "I have loved you for a thousand years, and I will love you for a thousand more.....one step closer."  On my journey I am continually reminded of two things, "You cannot orchestrate harmony with another, you can only orchestrate harmony with yourself." and "You never get it done."  So, here is to my journey, I am grateful to be here, for all those who have been on my journey, continue to be with me, and for all the new, wonderful experiences yet to come that bring me "One step closer."